Cool to be Kind

In the face of this blasting heat that blankets our beautiful city of Salt Lake City, Utah, I’m faced with an expression that really resonates with me.  I tend to get irritated and tired when I’ve reached my saturation level of hot weather.  My body just doesn’t like it anymore so it sends the message to my mind to change environments.  Unless we escape to a movie theatre for a noon- 4 double feature 7 days a week,  I must come to peace with this hot weather.

I was driving with all my windows open feeling the hair dryer-esque breeze blow through the car when I pulled up behind a vanity license-plated red sportscar.  I love vanity plates!  They are so informative.  It’s too bad that they have the name “vanity plate” because I would consider getting one.  This car owner’s expression to the world read

B KINDER

Yes!  I love that someone paid extra $$$$/mullah/dinero (not sure how much the vanity plate is in Utah but it’s definitely pricey!) to share this sentiment with our world.  Yaaaa!  This really makes me smile.  I saw another one that made me smile

GR8FUL

Those are solid expressions.  I want to get to know the drivers of those vehicles!!

This past weekend was the Utah Summer Games.  My rowing team and I competed on the Great Salt Lake.  It was a blisteringly roasty day and I definitely reached my saturation level of heat.  I was turning in to a bitch.  However, when I turned outward on my environment and took part in a competitive sporting event,  I was observant to a transformation of consciousness that totally rocked my world!

My group of high school rowers demonstrate this spirit of awakening to kindness, gratitude and harmony.  It warms my heart when after a race, they all celebrate by carrying their “coxswains” (smaller athletes who steer and motivate their boatmates), down to the dock to be tossed into the salt/brine shrimp & fly soup.  Afterwards, the coxswains run around hugging their teammates.  This hug is a soaking wet, smelly foul hug but the sentiment sure is lovely! 

In addition to rowing, our team plays a lot of games.  One of their favorite games to play is called Hugby.  I learned how to play it in high school.  My gym shorts actually got dragged down my body.  Yes,  Hugby sounds a lot like Rugby.  We don’t smash into each other; we hug each other.  Here is the jist—I call out a number more than 1 but less than the total number of kids.  The kids have to form a group of bodies representing that number.  The best way to do this is to hug each other.  One of my favorite images is watching two teenage boys crash into each others arms because they realize they can make the complete number.  It’s pretty hilarious. 

I heard somewhere that we need 4 hugs a day.  Hugby is really fun but the best part is watching the kids really get into it.   

One of my challenges as a coach is how much to emphasize competition.  My recollection of cut throat competition is tainted in a grim way.  The essence of team is to create a forum that supports positive attitudes, kindness, confidence, fun, support and harmony.  The forum for Utah Crew comes in many different styles.  We row;  we have French toast parties; we play follow the leader; we create and prepare food that will nourish our bodies;  we celebrate each other’s differences; we dig yoga; we dance; we laugh and we row on the most fascinating bodies of water that I’ve ever rowed on.

The kind of competition that I would like to teach on our team is more focusing on personal and individual excellence vs.  the alternative that invites ego.  The ego and excellence can go hand in hand but the eventuality of competition breeds insecurities, fear of failure, cheating, lying, and worst of all, the fun is taken out of the forum.  However, when we focus on personal excellence, our minds can become .  The task, I believe, is to do your very best.  Being clear to this task invites a healthy spirit which can be really fun. 

SPORTSMANship is a word that should demonstrate how all MAN who play SPORTS should play.  Unfortunately, MAN who play SPORTS,  doesn’t always embody the spirit of SPORTSMANSHIP because of competition.  Watching athletes smash their tennis rackets into the ground while pounding their feast towards their competitor is just not kind.  It truly is a double-edge sword and I hate it when teammates get cut by it!  Ouch!     

Things to chew on:  Life is too short to stay mean.  Kindness is such much cooler.  Just feel that cool air melt into your skin and loosen up your heart!